At the end of the last school year, with a substitute teacher at the helm of the class, my son's best friend punched him in the stomach. Noah, with the intent of being helpful, pointed out a misspelling on the project his friend had slaved over and was about to submit. Noah's friend, whose forte is not spelling, lashed out at Noah in frustration. The punch surprised and hurt both of them. They were both sent to the principal's office, and Noah's friend spent the whole school day there.
I saw the friend's mother that night at a school event that Noah's friend could not attend as punishment for the punch. The look on her face was difficult for both of us. "It's okay," I said. "It sounds like the school took care of it." Noah's school, like many progressive schools, has instituted anti-harassment and anti-bullying policies, and more importantly, follow through in their enforcement.
She brightened. "Yes. I think they went a bit overboard - I mean, it was just rough-housing. But they can't act that way at school."
"No," I responded kindly but clearly. "We don't hit in our house. And it was a violation of school rules."
"Yes," she said, and we parted the awkward company.
Noah also thought his friend's punishment was a bit extreme. "I'm not upset anymore," Noah reported. "Why did he have to stay in the principal's office all day?"
I thought for a moment, and spoke out of my own experience. "Because, honey: if he doesn't learn to control himself and act respectfully now in school, he'll be fired from his job when he's an adult for that type of behavior. It's for his own good." Noah's eyes widened, and he nodded. He's 9 years old, and he gets it. Mom has fired adults for hitting and bullying each other.
Taking a stand against bullying, regardless of age or organization, is taking a stand for inclusiveness, which in turn, is good business.
How is it good business? Banishing bullying from your organization will help minimize the chance that your customers will be treated badly by your employees. Simple as that. The internal organizational behavioral norms and values absolutely dictate how your employees interact with your customers.
Without that integrity between internal and external behaviors and values, your customers -- and your business -- are at risk. It is a paradigm bereft of all authenticity. And your customers crave authentic interactions.
Taking a stand against bullying also minimizes the needs for third-party involvement, e.g. proposed and current anti-bullying legislation and regulations. If you're keeping the house of your organization clean, what impact will such mandates really have on your organization? This stand also minimizes the risk of violating other current harassment and other laws and regulations protecting employees.
An anti-bullying stance is also an educational stand. Not only only is risk minimized, but the potential for enlightenment and re-direction is possible even for adult learners: a manifestation for my continual hope for resurrection on the human level. If not: then organization bullies need to be made available to industry, as they say.
Noah and his friend remain pals.
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